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Patricia

Briefly

[This is where the summary would go if I'd bothered to write one.]

« Week 141Changes »
Writober 05: 12 Things, Loosely Related
  1. Poor as my country is, every time I travel there I marvel at its beauty.
  2. I tell people I like vacationing in El Salvador during Christmas and New Year’s because of the fireworks but that’s only half of the truth. I go for the 10 pm dinners, the midnight hugs and kisses, the 1 am card games, the 3 am domino competitions and the 5 am whispered discussions over who gets the couch, the bed or the floor.
  3. Throughout my childhood and most of my early teens, I would shove my face into my pillow and cry, hoping the muffled sobs wouldn’t cause more anger. “Please,” I’d whisper, “just let me go away.”
  4. One day I realized that the things I was most afraid of, I could never leave behind.
  5. Though I find Virginia too cold for my tastes, every winter I wait till the last possible day to don my heavy winter coat in a passive-aggressive attempt to show Mother Nature that she’s not the boss of me.
  6. On a chilly Thursday night three years ago I stood on a beach in California and something inside of me clicked. There, alone, cold and in the dark, I had never felt more whole.
  7. “When are you going to give me a cousin or a nephew,” she asks,unsure of the label, but certain of the fact that she and I, through a fortunate meeting fifteen years ago, have become family.
  8. My heart stops and I quickly flash back to a quote I encountered just this past weekend. “A girlfriend is a sister that fate forgot to give you.” I look into her inquisitive eyes, the curve of her cheek and I see so much of her mother in those features.
  9. I am sure that my heart is about to burst with love and I again marvel at how someone so unrelated to me can overlook my many flaws and celebrate my every success no matter how small. I let out a quick breath, “I don’t know, sweetie. Maybe one of these days.”
  10. My mind fills with images of my child being surrounded by loving arms, lips always at the ready to spread love and comfort.
  11. Twenty-four years ago I had to say goodbye to aunts and uncles, grandmothers and cousins, friends and country. I lost my roots and have lived the ensuing years unsure of where I belong.
  12. My thoughts often turn west, my body aching for that feeling of peacefulness, but here, in seemingly unimportant moments, I find something greater, something better. I find the meaning of home.

Published 10/17/05 in Writing • Writober • | Views: 2242 times | Print

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